9. Control Your Woman Remote Controller
This item looks like any ordinary TV remote control, but it is a hilariously novelty gift for people who have trouble controlling their unruly girlfriends or wives. You may especially appreciate its breast button; although it doesn’t seem to work, the button certainly will get the most use. This should make a wonderful gift for birthdays, Valentine’s Day or wedding anniversary. With Control Your Woman Remote Controller you can turn any nagging, whining wife with zero sex drive into something you’ve been longing for. No batteries needed; it’s only powered by positive thinking.